May 20, 2010

Ramblings

greasy chinese food amongst the packing and boxes..

I've been meaning to post pictures of our multi-birthday pool party this past Sunday but I haven't had a chance to transfer them from my camera yet. Right now I'm sitting in Starbucks, once again, because they've been doing showings at our apartment since we're moving. I used to get really irritated because it feels like every freakin day I get kicked out of my apartment, but at this point I just feel bad for them because they've had so many people come through but no takers. I don't know that they'll rent it out again for a while. We didn't want to rent it again either! And they're lucky we stayed for a year and a half! 

Anyway this weekend/next week is gonna get crazy with finishing packing, moving, and working out carpet cleaning times with when we'll actually have everything moved out. I think it's lookin like we're moving next Friday now, then having our place cleaned Saturday and doing the walk-out Sunday. Plus I have a graduation party Saturday night and a baby's 1st birthday party the following Monday. Plus unpacking. Ugh. I'm probably just making it more complicated in my head but I guess it's the anticipation, as usual, that gets to me. I need to learn patience. Especially with a baby on the way!

 Other than that I've been EXTRA sentimental about being pregnant lately. Now that I feel good, my belly is obvious, we know she's a "she", and I've been feeling her move and kick so much I'm really bonding with her. People are always telling me to enjoy it because it goes by so quick and trust me I'm trying to savor every single feeling about this. It really is a crazy miracle and as strange as it can be sometimes I can already tell that I'll actually miss being pregnant once she's born. When I feel her move, I touch my stomach and shut my eyes and really try to be in the moment. It's funny, even when you're living completely in that moment you still don't quite feel that it's enough. My feelings are already so strong but I want to feel more and deeper. I take nothing for granted and

she just kicked again :o)

my point is I'm grateful and even though my feelings are at full capacity I force them to completely overflow because I hope that some part of our combined beings right now allows her to already feel the love that I have for her.

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